Okay, let’s plumb the depths of McBush over the past few days.

First, an appetizer: Bush claimed, in an interview, that while our own brave young men & women fought and died in Bush’s unnecessary, politically-motivated, wasteful, al-Qaeda-boosting, and horribly mismanaged war in Iraq, Bush himself was paying a terrible, unthinkable price: he gave up golf. In an interview with The Politico, Bush said:

Q: Mr. President, you haven’t been golfing in recent years. Is that related to Iraq?

Bush: Yes, it really is. I don’t want some mom whose son may have recently died to see the commander-in-chief playing golf. I feel I owe it to the families to be as — to be in solidarity as best as I can with them. And I think playing golf during a war just sends the wrong signal.

Q: Mr. President, was there a particular moment or incident that brought you to that decision, or how did you come to that?

Bush: No, I remember when de Mello, who was at the U.N., got killed in Baghdad as a result of these murderers taking this good man’s life. And I was playing golf — I think I was in central Texas — and they pulled me off the golf course and I said, it’s just not worth it anymore to do.

This absurdly outrageous question was just as offensive to soldiers as anyone imagined:

Brandon Friedman, a veteran US infantry officer who served in both Iraq and Afghanistan, told the Press Association: “Thousands of Americans have given up a lot more than golf for this war. For President Bush to imply that he somehow stands in solidarity with families of American soldiers by giving up golf is disgraceful. It’s an insult to all Americans and a slap in the face to our troops’ families.”

The real slap in the face: Bush was lying–he hadn’t given up his golf game, not for de Mello:

The problem is that Sergio Vieira de Mello, the top U.N. envoy in Iraq at the time, was killed Aug. 19, 2003. Bush, according to news reports, was still playing two days later, when he teed off at the Crosswater Golf Course in Sunriver, Ore., during a two-day visit to the Pacific Northwest.

He also played Sept. 28 with friends at Andrews Air Force Base course and again there on Oct. 13, in honor of Columbus Day. It appears that he didn’t golf after that — at least judging from a review of media coverage since then.

Keith Olbermann had a few sharp words for Bush on this.

Not to be outdone, McCain gave a major policy speech today which could quite legitimately be called the “Magic Pony” speech. In it, McCain fantasized about ending his first term in January 2013:

By January 2013, America has welcomed home most of the servicemen and women who have sacrificed terribly so that America might be secure in her freedom. The Iraq War has been won. Iraq is a functioning democracy… The increase in actionable intelligence that the counterinsurgency produced led to the capture or death of Osama bin Laden, and his chief lieutenants. There is no longer any place in the world al Qaeda can consider a safe haven. … There still has not been a major terrorist attack in the United States since September 11, 2001. The United States and its allies have made great progress in advancing nuclear security. … The size of the Army and Marine Corps has been significantly increased, and are now better equipped and trained to defend us. … the United States, acting in concert with a newly formed League of Democracies, applied stiff diplomatic and economic pressure that caused the government of Sudan to agree to a multinational peacekeeping force, with NATO countries providing logistical and air support, to stop the genocide….

The United States has experienced several years of robust economic growth, and Americans again have confidence in their economic future. … Congress has just passed by a single up or down vote a tax reform proposal that offers Americans a choice of continuing to file under the rules of the current complicated and burdensome tax code or use a new, simpler, fairer and flatter tax, with two rates and a generous deduction. … Congress has not sent me an appropriations bill containing earmarks for the last three years. … New free trade agreements have been ratified and led to substantial increases in both exports and imports. … The world food crisis has ended, inflation is low, and the quality of life not only in our country, but in some of the most impoverished countries around the world is much improved. … Public education in the United States is much improved thanks to the competition provided by charter and private schools…. Test scores and graduation rates are rising everywhere in the country.

Health care has become more accessible to more Americans than at any other time in history. … The reduction in the growth of health care costs has begun to relieve some of the pressure on Medicare; … Their success encouraged a group of congressional leaders from both parties to work with my administration to fix Social Security as well, without reducing benefits to those near retirement. … The United States is well on the way to independence from foreign sources of oil; progress that has not only begun to alleviate the environmental threat posed from climate change, but has greatly improved our security as well. … Scores of judges have been confirmed to the federal district and appellate courts, including the U.S. Supreme Court, who understand that they were not sent there to write our laws but to enforce them….our southern border is now secure. Illegal immigrants who broke our laws after they came here have been arrested and deported. Illegal immigration has been finally brought under control…. A sense of community, a kinship of ideals, has invigorated public service again.

As I said before, winsome fairies and prancing unicorns would not have been out of place in this speech. I have extravagant hopes for the achievements of an Obama administration, but not only do I keep them to myself, none even come close to the massive self-indulgent, massively overreaching self-gratification McCain wallowed in with this speech; he must think he’s the freakin’ second coming or something.

Had he given the speech in terms of goals, that would be one thing–but to try to convince people that in four years he could solve virtually all the world’s problems single-handedly and accomplish more than all other presidents combined… it comes across as absurdly arrogant, self-aggrandizing fantasy.

Fortunately for McCain, he did not have much time to suffer the ridicule that naturally follows such inanity: Bush stole the limelight and made an even bigger fool of himself soon after… with McCain quickly jumping on Bush’s brainless bandwagon. More on that in Part II.